Divorce column – February 2026

An Amicable Divorce – is there any such thing?
Sometimes people ask whether there is any such thing as an amicable divorce? The short answer is yes — but it’s important to be realistic about what it looks like.
Divorce is rarely easy. It’s an inherently divisive process. Even where both parties agree that the relationship has come to an end there are often strong emotions involved – sadness, hurt feelings, anger, blame, anxiety about the future, worries about money, housing and arrangements for children. An amicable divorce should not be understood as a process without these emotions or without difficulty, but rather one in which difficulties are addressed respectfully, sensibly and constructively rather than combatively.
In practice, being amicable is less about how people feel and more about their mindset and behaviour. It involves communicating openly, providing full and honest financial disclosure and focussing on realistic resolution rather than revisiting past grievances.
Some suggest that involving solicitors might inflame matters, but in practice taking early legal advice can help manage expectations, clear up misunderstandings and provide a clear framework for negotiations. This can help people in making informed decisions. When people understand their legal position discussions can often be more realistic, more focussed and this can assist in reaching a fair resolution more efficiently and cost effectively.
Where children are involved, an amicable approach becomes especially important. While the adult relationship may be ending the role of parenting continues. Keeping conflict to a minimum and prioritising the welfare of the children can help promote stability and support healthier co-parenting in the long term.
It’s also important to note that ‘amicable’ doesn’t mean requiring one party to be a pushover and accept an unfair outcome. It’s not about being soft. Pursuing a fair outcome can be done robustly while remaining respectful and constructive, provided the focus remains on reasonableness and resolution rather than recrimination.
So, is an amicable divorce possible? Yes — with the right mindset and the right guidance, on both sides.
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